That’s right, folks. Sometimes we just need to kick back and wear a green hat. There’s nothing like a perfectly green hat. You’ll appreciate the sensation of wearing a viridian dome-topper when you’re knee deep in the underbrush, looking for spotted leapers and speckled geckos.

You’ll look just fabulous as you strut around town, looking under bushes, examining cigarette butts, kicking pebbles –  it’s just you in your green hat. Verdant. Everybody will look at you in a coy manner, with their eyelashes fluttering just so, and they’ll spy your cap first and foremost.

They’ll know that they’re dealing with a real emerald dragon. You might expect to pay between $13 and…